I’m excited to share my look back on the year. And honestly, respectfully, 2020 was nothing. I already experienced my “Impossible Year” in 2019. And through 2019, God showed me who I am and who’s I am. He showed me how valuable I am and how big his plans are in comparison to my own. So coming into 2020, I faced challenges with an understanding of who I am and who’s I am! Now don’t get me wrong, 2020 came with some mess! I’ll mention specifically COVID-19 and the racial/injustice issues that transpired in this year alone, but for real, I’m not going to dig in too much to the depths of those because there was seriously so much to grapple with in 2020. Making it more personal and speaking more specifically to my own disappointments in 2020…I also lost out on the first job posting I ever felt had been written to my specific experience and talents. Throughout 2020 I’ve cried, I’ve laughed, I’ve been angry, I’ve been offended, and so much more. We all have, right? But you know what has remained the same through all of 2020 – my God! He is so faithful! I am so blessed to experience His grace and love! And as I look back on 2020, through the pain and tears and confusion, let me tell you what I highlight:
Character – I know who I am! Removing the need for external validations, I have based my self-worth in what God says about me! I have committed to building a Christ like character and every challenge I faced in 2020 served as an opportunity to walk in that character. To respond with grace, patience, kindness, peace, and love. It wasn’t always easy, nor was it always my first reaction. But by way of hearing God’s voice through the many people He as intentionally placed in my life to pour into me, every raw feeling and emotion was guided back to the traits of Jesus. I received constant reminders to release the carnal responses to my challenges and rise to the calling of seeking heaven’s perspective through it all!
Authenticity – In every area of my life, I have been called to love God and love people. Love can be inconvenient, hard, and sacrificial! And I have proven my heart and character throughout this year by approaching even the most uncomfortable and inconvenient situations by living as God as called me to – loving people. While I believe this is a universal assignment, what makes it personal for me, staying true to myself as I love like Christ. I don’t know everything, nor do I understand everything. So it’s fair and appropriate for me to ask questions to better understand. I genuinely care about people, so when I see situations that do not serve the better part of the group, I will offer up to be the voice standing for what I believe needs to be said. Challenging the accepted norm in an effort to elevate the whole to higher standards.
Unapologetic – this year, combining having a deep understanding of my own character and being intentional about living authentically has led me to walking and living unapologetically. My playing small does not serve the world! “There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you…As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.”
Looking towards 2021, I am just as hopeful for a brighter year as the next person, but take it from someone who left an impossible year of 2019, to enter into the chaotic year of 2020…you never know what you’re walking into. So God forbid it, but even if 2021 brings worse conditions than this year, my resolution (resolution – a firm decision to do or not do something) for 2021 is to trust God. I want to see His will for my life come into fruition with as little resistance from me as possible. I am assured that His will will be done and all things would work out for the good (see Romans 8:28), but I want to lessen the time for me to get on board with His plan. I want to walk in obedience to how He has called me to live and trust that no matter what He brings me to, He has already prepared me for and will bring me through.